Friday, December 12, 2014

Parma, Perspective and Personhood

Entering a new country, traversing foreign segments of the globe and inhabiting a new household amongst complete strangers, evokes challenges, insights and alternative modes of seeing. Over the past few months in Europe, I have oriented myself towards various destinations, while remaining anchored in Parma for the duration of my experience. The weekend features of my stay have been incredible, but are the embellishments on the fabric of my experience, rather than the primary composition that has made it so special. Parma has become my home. It has been the place where I return, at the conclusion of a long weekend, where I spend time after classes and where I dine amongst the family that has warmly welcomed me into their home and into their lives.

My initial impression of Parma pales in comparison to what it has come to mean for me today. As I sit at the kitchen table of my host family, enjoying a fresh cup of coffee while one of my brothers ventures to school with his Nonna and my other brother sits to my left eating cereal, pleasantly surprised by an immediate vacation from school due to a teacher strike, I contemplate the elements of my experience that have distinguished my time in this lovely place.  Just last night, I stood, embracing my host brother as tears streamed down his face, after discovering that Santa Claus was imagined and not real. Positing that the magic still exists can’t compensate for the destruction of innocence that accompanies this realization. Small, but pivotal moments like this serve as a reminder of the time and space I occupy in the lives of my host family members, in addition to them occupying a place in mine. The reciprocal exchanges we have shared over the past months have been highly impressionable and have differentiated my life as a Parmesan, as well as molded their experiences.

Living with my host family has certainly made my study abroad experience. There are challenges embedded in this immersion process, but it is undoubtedly a inequitable feature of living in this new home. Living with a host family makes the experience real. Not to detract from other living arrangements, but it allows you to see the moments of struggle and epitomes of joy people undergo while conducting themselves in an environment that is not subject to the artificial regimen of a school-sleep-play schedule. Pensive and meaningful conversations take place. People are vulnerable. Sometimes, it isn’t all that grand. But it allows me to see and experience and live amongst others who are managing more than a predetermined schedule that alternates by block classes on Monday, Wednesday, Friday then Tuesday, Thursday. And this is different. I have never lived, and directed my experiences without the commitments of clubs and alternative activities, amidst my studies before. I haven’t constructed a lifestyle in the same ideology of the concept, while in school before. The autonomy embedded in the study abroad experience, coupled with the experience of a host family living situation, evokes an entirely different perspective than I would have acquired at Boston College or any environment at an educational institution in America. The emphasis on conversation, priority of family relationships and immersion in the present, in the joy of the moment, are tendencies I appreciate and hope to transplant to Boston College. While I realize this is impossible due to the dynamics of my schedule and the extent of my commitments, I am still thankful for this perspective and introduction to a mode of living that presents an alternative to my usual mode of operation.

In addition to the relationships I have bridged with others in this setting, I have been able to develop a better relationship with myself, delving into areas of introspection that where previously left unperturbed due to other commitments. During my time abroad, I have been blessed with the time to reflect. This unique gift has allowed me to truly take time for myself, contemplate the relevance of my experiences and reconsider how I would like to proceed in my time at Boston College and beyond. While this was not originally an ostensible benefit of going abroad, it has been one of the most invaluable pieces of my experience. The lessons learned and perspective acquired will truly transcend the extent of my stay in Parma, and help me formulate my life going forward. For this I am thankful. For study abroad I am unequivocally appreciative. For all of those that enabled me to take on this new adventure, Grazie.

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